Find The Humor In It...

New "Diet" Utensils ...

September 28, 2011 12:24 PM

What we all need is one of these spoons to eat with and
dieting would be SO much easier!

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In the beginning God created broccoli.

August 18, 2011 8:22 AM

In the beginning, God created the Heavens and the Earth and populated the Earth with broccoli, cauliflower and spinach, green and yellow and red vegetables of all kinds, so Man and Woman would live long and healthy lives.

Then using God's great gifts, Satan created Breyer's Ice Cream and Tim Horton's Donuts. And Satan said, "You want chocolate with that?" And Man said, "Yes!" and Woman said, "and as long as you're at it, add some sprinkles." And they gained 10 pounds. And Satan smiled.

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In the beginning God created broccoli.

August 17, 2011 2:17 PM

In the beginning, God created the Heavens and the Earth and populated the Earth with broccoli, cauliflower and spinach, green and yellow and red vegetables of all kinds, so Man and Woman would live long and healthy lives.

Then using God's great gifts, Satan created Breyer's Ice Cream and Tim Horton's Donuts. And Satan said, "You want chocolate with that?" And Man said, "Yes!" and Woman said, "and as long as you're at it, add some sprinkles." And they gained 10 pounds. And Satan smiled.

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Shampoo Warning!

July 27, 2011 3:10 PM

I don't know WHY I didn't figure this out sooner! It's the shampoo I use in the shower! When I wash my hair, the shampoo runs down my whole body and (duh!) printed very clearly on the shampoo label is this warning,
FOR EXTRA VOLUME AND BODY!

NO wonder I have been
gaining weight!!!

Well! I have gotten rid of that shampoo and I am going to start using Dawn dish soap instead.
Their label reads, DISSOLVES FAT THAT IS OTHERWISE DIFFICULT TO REMOVE.

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Road Trip Humor ...

July 19, 2011 1:44 PM

GOING ON A ROAD TRIP?
Think the price of gas is expensive?

All these examples do NOT imply that gasoline is cheap; it just illustrates how outrageous some prices are.... You will be really shocked by the last one! (At least, I was...) This makes one think, and also puts things in perspective.

Compared with Gasoline ...

• Diet Snapple 16 oz $1.29 = $10.32 per gallon

• Lipton Ice Tea 16 oz $1.19 = $9.52 per gallon

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Knowledge is ...

May 18, 2011 3:37 PM

Knowledge is knowing a tomato is a fruit.

Wisdom is not putting it in a fruit salad.

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The ever-changing rules of health ...

May 5, 2011 10:59 PM

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At the Yearly Exam ...

April 28, 2011 8:48 AM

I went to the doctor for my yearly physical.
The nurse started with certain basics.

"How much do you weigh?", she asked.
"135" I replied.
The nurse weighed me. It turns out my weight is 180.

The nurse asked, "Your height?"
"5 feet, 6 inches," I answered.
The nurse measured me at 5 feet, 2 inches.
She then took my blood pressure and told me it was high.

"Of course it's high!" I screamed.

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